A tongue-in-cheek yet insightful description of the human condition and the problems of the world. God has put out an urgent recall notice for all of us! With thanks to the unknown author. And everlasting thanks to the original Author and manufacturer!
Urgent Recall Notice
The maker of all human beings (GOD) is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year.
This is due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.
There has been a malfunction in the original prototype units, code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.
This defect has been technically termed ‘Sub-sequential Internal Non-Morality’ – more commonly known as S.I.N.
Some of the symptoms include:
- Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behaviour
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
10. Envy
Factory Authorized Repair & Service – Free
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable, nor at fault, for this defect, is providing Factory Authorized Repair and Service free of charge to correct this defect.
The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
Call this number
The free call number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R.
Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.
Next, download ATONEMENT from the repair technician, Jesus, into the heart component.
No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self-control
Manual
Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E (Believers’ Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
Warning
Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list.
This will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.
For free emergency service, call the P-R-A-Y-E-R hotline & ask for Jesus.
Danger
The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped.
The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
Thank you for your attention!
GOD
P.S
Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice.
You may contact the Father any time by ‘Knee mail’.
Leave a Reply