Happy Father's Day from our Perfect Father

loren biser has released this “The Prodigal Son.” image under Public Domain license.

Here in Australia, we celebrate Father’s Day on the first Sunday in September. Back in May, I wrote Happy Mother’s Day for those who aren’t so happy about it. Now, I wonder if you are happy about Father’s Day?

Questions for our fathers

In my Duolingo course (app for learning foreign languages), I was surprised when it taught the sentence, “My father does not believe in me.” After lots of sentences like, “The waiter puts the plates on the table,” and “The secretary writes our names down,” then suddenly, a bad father!

I think we all want our fathers to believe in us. I know I wanted my father to be proud of me. I wanted him to notice me.

John and Stassi Eldrege Wild at Heart.org write that every child is asking questions that can only be answered by their fathers. They say that every boy asks, “Do I have what it takes?” Every girl asks, “Do you see me? Do you delight in me? Am I captivating?”

The universal question

Everyone is asking, “Do you love me?” Right from birth we need to know that we are loved. We can’t survive without love. We might survive with food, water and shelter, but we won’t thrive without love. (See Harry Harlow’s monkey experiments in the 1950s Harry Harlow)

Our imperfect fathers

I don’t know what your father was/is like. I don’t know how he answered your questions about whether you are loved, and whether you are loveable.

Perhaps you had an absent father, who was often away. Perhaps your parents separated, and you never really knew your father. Perhaps your father was too busy to notice you. Perhaps you had an addicted or violent father, and you preferred not to be near him. Perhaps your father just didn’t know how to give you the love you craved.

Perhaps you lost your father by death. Perhaps you didn’t get to have him guiding you as you grew up. Perhaps your father died more recently, and now, just when you want to talk to him, you can’t.

Perhaps you’ve deliberately run away from your father. He’s hurt you so much that you don’t want to have anything to do with him. Or perhaps you feel that you are the one at fault, and that after all you’ve done, he wouldn’t want to have anything to do with you. So, you’ve cut off all contact.

The prodigal son

The word ‘prodigal’ means spending or using large amounts of money, time, energy, etc, especially in a way that is not very wise.

The story of the prodigal son is in Luke 15:11-31. It’s a parable told by Jesus of two sons and their father. The younger son asks Dad to divide the inheritance and give him his share.

That sounds OK at first reading. But think about it. What he was saying was, “Dad, I can’t wait until you die. I want your money now. I don’t care that you might need it, just gimme what I want.”

Then, off he goes to a distant country with his newfound wealth, and squanders it all in wild living.

Well, squandering someone else’s money in wild living might not seem so bad to us. We’ve heard of that before, and maybe we’ve even done it ourselves, to a smaller degree.

However, the people to whom Jesus was speaking knew that there were very serious consequences for such a rebellious son:

If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who does not obey his father and mother and does not listen to them when disciplined, his father and mother are to lay hold of him and bring him to the elders of his city, to the gate of his hometown, and say to the elders, “This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he does not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.”

Then all the men of his city will stone him to death. So you must purge the evil from among you, and all Israel will hear and be afraid.
Deuteronomy 21:18-21

After spending all his money, the younger son is forced by need to go and feed pigs. That seems OK to us, working on the pig farm. BUT, to the Jews, this was unthinkable. They didn’t eat pork, nor did they raise pigs. In fact, pigs are disgusting to Jews.

The son is hungry, and wants to eat the pig food:

He longed to fill his belly with the pods the pigs were eating, but no one would give him a thing.
Luke 15:16

Finally, the son comes to his senses, and decides to return home. He prepares to confess his sin, say that he is no longer worthy to be called a son, and ask his father if he can work for him as a hired servant.

We might think this is reasonable, but in the culture of that time, the son had no right to even ask to be taken in as a hired servant. He had shamed his family, and deserved to be beaten, sent away and publicly humiliated. The villagers would have had a kezazah ceremony on the outskirts of the village, before he could get home. They would break pottery at the son’s feet, symbolizing that they were breaking relations with him, and he no longer belonged in their community.

The forgiving father

So, the son goes home. But, while he’s still a long way off, the father runs out to meet him:

But while he was still in the distance, his father saw him and was filled with compassion. He ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.
Luke 15:20

That seems OK to us. But, in those times, respectable, honourable men didn’t run. He would need to hitch up his garments, exposing his legs. This would be considered shameful.

Also, remember that the son has been working with pigs. If you have ever visited a piggery, you know the powerful, awful odour that lingers on your clothes and hair even if you don’t touch anything. You stink!

Imagine the humiliation for the father. Running in public down the road to greet his foul-smelling, unkempt, rebellious, shameful son. The father doesn’t seem to mind.

He’s been waiting for a very long time, looking down the road, just hoping the wayward son will come home. He rushes to greet him before the townspeople can give him the kezazah ceremony that he deserves.

The son makes his confession, but the father’s reaction is amazing.

The son declared, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.

But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let us feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again! He was lost and is found!’ So they began to celebrate.
Luke 15:21-24

The father embraces and kisses his son, (even though he stinks), a sign of forgiveness. He gives him a robe, a mark of distinction; a signet ring, a sign of authority; and shoes, worn only by freemen.

Then he sets up a feast to celebrate. He honours the son, welcoming him back into the family and into the community.

What about me?

Jesus told this parable for you and me. We are the prodigal children. We have rejected our Heavenly Father, and wasted His gifts.

Sometimes, we’re ignorant of our sin against God. Or we excuse it, thinking that it’s not so bad. Even if we think we haven’t done much wrong, we are sinful by nature:

Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
Psalm 51:5

God didn’t change the rules. Sin must still be paid for:

The wages of sin is death.
Romans 6:23a

But Jesus came to pay the price.

But the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 6:24b

Jesus bore the shame of rejection, betrayal, mocking, flogging, and the disgraceful, agonisingly slow death by crucifixion.

He was stripped naked, and hung on the cross to die. Our representations have Jesus wearing a loin cloth, but the Bible says he was naked. How shameful to be exposed to his mother, the women, and many onlookers. How shameful to be known as a criminal.

To die on a cross was considered to be under God’s curse.

Jesus took the curse we deserved – death. He paid the price for our sin. He allowed His divinity to be put in question. He willingly took the evil of the entire world upon his shoulders. The hate of mankind and the wrath of God fell upon Jesus, as he took the shame and pain that we deserved.

Amazing grace

I can’t really understand it. Jesus, true God, took the penalty for me. He paid the price so that I could be forgiven. Jesus was sacrificed so that I could be saved!

Like the father in the parable, God is waiting for you. He longs for you to return to Him.

You don’t have to worry that He will reject you. Jesus was rejected so that you can be welcomed as a child of God.

You don’t have to worry that your sin is too big to be forgiven. Jesus paid for ALL your sin.